Been watching porn videos downloaded from the Internet (G’s doing, completely not mine) since yesterday.

One in particular I liked, titled “Late for Work” starring Keira and Seth (which may not even be their names).

Just realized that there is such a thing as “good” porn and “bad” porn. The “good” can touch you in a “good” way. Like the one I mentioned. I particularly liked how the two actors looked. They must be in their late teens or early 20″s. Their bodies still have that yummy tightness that will eventually sag once they reach their 4th decade on planet earth.

The boy (and he was a boy on the cusp of manhood) had this deliciously cute face with the most earnest of expressions. Almost innocent. That naughty tilting up of the lips, slightly slanting eyes. His body is almost adolescent but holding such promise. The girl had big eyes, small lips and small breasts on one thin girlish body. She makes soft, high-pitched sounds when she orgasms.

They had chemistry, the girl and the boy — oops, they do have names, Keira and Seth. The chemistry is the most erotic part and not the penis-in-the-vagina.

Is this a sign that I’m getting old? That I can look at and write about a porn film with a straight face, without blushing. I couldn’t have done this 10 years ago. Well 10 years ago I was a virgin. Maybe that’s a factor. The girl I was wouldn’t have been able to write about porn and sex without putting in a lot of euphemisms in her prose.

What brought this frankness? The “nice girl” part of me says “having been in love”. The “slut girl” , on the other hand, thinks that it’s all about having been fucked and having been fucked good.

I so love that word – the F word, as the prudish ones say. It can hold so many meanings, so many contexts.

If writing is all about falling in love, I am now in the part where I took my clothes off.


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