Another Thing With Virgins

The best time for planning a book is while you’re doing the dishes. Agatha Christie

To paraphrase, “The best time for planning a blog post is while driving at 15 mph along EDSA during SM Megasale weekend.” – Anastasia Christina

***

Charrise is a virgin. That is not very difficult to understand given that Charrisse is also a nerd. Who loves Gloria Steinem.

She once asked Ana regarding the risk factors for staying untouched, untutored, innocent, un-fucked, as far as females are concerned.

Ana: There has been no formal study done on the subject, from what I know.

Charrise: Really? Well then, I’m fucked!

Ana: No, dear, you’re not. Otherwise, we won’t be having this conversation.

Charrise:  Ha ha, great joke!

Ana: (contrite) Sorry. (The truth is, this morning, Ana had an Aubrey-Plaza moment, albeit with someone named Christian, so she should be forgiven for being distracted.)

Charrise: Ana, really! I think I will die like – you know – this!

Ana: Say the word, darling. You’ll feel better.

Charrise: I can’t. It sounds sooo … dirty, you know?

Ana: I know what you mean. Everybody just get their kicks out of making fun of them.

Charrise: Yes. Just what is so wrong with being …

Ana: … untouched, untutored, innocent, un-fucked?

Charrise: See, even you can’t say the word.

Ana: Of course I can. Virgin. There.

Charrise: (wails) That’s because you’ve had sex!

Ana: Oh Charrise, what can I say? This guy told me once that really, men do pretend that virgins don’t matter. But the truth is, nobody, not even men, can resist having something that is shiny and new.

Madonna, who was ironically, thought of as queen of sluts, was once a virgin too! Picture from www.nydailynews.com.

Madonna, who was ironically, thought of as queen of sluts, was once a virgin too! Picture from http://www.nydailynews.com.

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