Do Not Blame Me For This Post, Blame Germaine Greer

A Morning Prayer

Oh god, if I do get around to bringing out a child into this backwater world at the edge of the Milky Way, please let it not be female. For then, I have just condemned another human being into slavery. I watched Spartacus and I saw what can be done on (,to and at)  slaves. I don’t believe that they will still be as ripped and hunky as Andy Whitfield and Liam McIntyre once the Romans are through with them. Or maybe they will. But if it’s a girl and ends up with the role that producers gave Katrina Law — oh god lord, worse than death. Imagine having a domina like Lucretia (Lucy Lawless! woohooo!) threaten you to either fuck Spartacus or have something else sharper into your vagina (literally) — sheer horror, dear lord. Of course, god, being male and slave won’t be much better. But at least Spartacus got his name on the following classical books (according to Wikipedia) written by classical MCPs :

Appian. Civil Wars. Translated by J. Carter. (Harmondsworth: Penguin Books, 1996)

Florus. Epitome of Roman History. (London: W. Heinemann, 1947)

Orosius. The Seven Books of History Against the Pagans. Translated by Roy J. Deferrari. (Washington, DC: Catholic University of America Press, 1964).

Plutarch. Fall of the Roman Republic. Translated by R. Warner. (London: Penguin Books, 1972), with special emphasis placed on “The Life of Crassus” and “The Life of Pompey”.

Sallust. Conspiracy of Catiline and the War of Jugurtha. (London: Constable, 1924)

Lord, que horror, all the girls in the TV series were fictional ! Such an atrocity, don’t you think? Please lord, please answer. Do you think it was an atrocity?

Dear Lord! What abs! Even Gannicus was a historical character. So why not Mira, and Lucretia, and Ilythia? Image from Wikipedia.

Dear Lord! What abs! Even Gannicus was a historical character. So why not Mira, and Lucretia, and Ilythia? Image from Wikipedia.

***

If men could menstruate, they would brag about how long and how much. – Gloria Steinem.

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